San Francisco; v2.0

Last weekend, we took my second trip to SF. We left at 4:30am on Thursday, after getting home at 1am from an excellent Lucero show that included $3 scotch drinks. Needless to say, 4:30am found me still a little tipsy and riding shotgun.

We worked the Festival of Sail, and stayed at a neat little Motel 6 downtown. We did all the normal stuff; the Wharf, the Piers, rode a cable car (hanging off the side even!), saw Lombard Street, ate Escape From New York pizza, and just plained bummed around. San Francisco is just amazing.

This is just fun…

Self cleaning public toilets! And if you need to buy crack, there’s a nice little playground there to do so…

I read a post on BMXBoard about moving to SF, and kept seeing people talk about this awful neghborhood, The Tenderloin. So, I decided to find out where it was. As I sat in my hotel, searching on my iPhone, I found Tenderloin was also known as Exactly Where I was Sitting. That explains why a pimp complimented my choice in a wife, a guy was on the street screaming to his old lady a few stories up, and the abundance of liquor stores. I honestly didn’t find the neighborhood that bad. Sketchy, yes. Dangerous, eh. My favorite part is the neighborhood between there and Nob Hill is called The Tendernob. Heh.

Long Time, No Write.

Sorry for the deeeelay. For the past few weeks, I’ve been in Milwaukee for my wedding, which was absolutely perfect in nearly every way, five days there the honeymoon, then the other five days at the Grand Floridian at Walt Disney World. Needless to say, it’s been a fantastic few weeks for me.

I have had lots and lots swirling about in my noggin for this blog; but as I sit down, I only have two things that come to mind:

1. I HATE those ball sacks that hang from underneath truck bumpers. If your truck has balls, it probably also contains a douchebag.

2. With all this Brett Favre news (the ESPN Bottom Line ticker now has a FAVRE category, along with NFL MLB NCAA…) going around these days, how did they miss him turning black? Further inspection of this package also indicates that he now looks exactly like Reggie Miller.

I’m married.

Me and my lovely wife…

Random Thoughts from a beach festival.

Over the weekend, we worked a crappy little beach festival in Redondo Beach. Here’s the highlights of things I saw:

• A 10 year old girl with a temporary tattoo tramp stamp wearing a crop top.
• A guy cruising leisurely down the street on his long board, flipped it up the curb and his back truck fell off. I’m pretty sure he looked up and mouthed, “Oh well man, at least I still live at the beach” at me, then laughed like Matthew McConaughey.
• A storeowner screaming at everyone about the vendors located in front of her store. Everyone’s attempts to help or appease her were met with resistance, because I think what she really wanted was this 30+ year old festival to not even happen at all.

Our ushers.

Thursday Product Endorsement; Always Google Potential Employers First

So last week, I threw out a bunch of resumes to postings on Craigslist. I got one response, asking me to fill out an online application, and subsequently to come in for an interview. Simple, right?

So I have said interview today at 3pm. I am looking, might I say, dapper. I am rocking a sweet 70’s brown Oleg Cassini tie, courtesy of DBZ. Not to mention my sweet beard and mountain man hair. I drove the Corvette up to the place, which may not seem to be that big of a deal…

…but in 1971, A/C was an option like whoa. Not only that, but a 350ci motor gets hot. And black leather/vinyl seats… whatever, stupid thing to complain about, right? Being something dumb, like 108° degrees out today, you pretty much have to leave the top up to keep the sun off you. Needless to say, I was a tad sweaty. Just as I get news of a Brewers no-hitter in progress, I head in and meet the HR lady.

She gives me your standard “write a formal business letter given this situation and sign this background authorization.” Immediately, things are not right. I do the letter. Damn well, too. I don’t sign the form. I ask her a question, and she answers. I sign the form and have a 10 minute interview/problem solving test and she says to expect a call because I obviously rock ten kinds of ass.

I leave and find out that the Brewers no-hitter was busted in the 8th. The bullpen came into the ninth and gave up 7 runs and almost cost Bush the W.

What is the big secret you ask?

The company uses a management style/technique/philosophy designed by L. Ron Hubbard.

The question I asked?

Is this company owned by, or associated with the Church of Scientology?

Her answer was, “No, not at all.” Which seemed reasonable, as I know big companies use all sorts of stupid management methods. But this was a lie, which I found out when I got home and googled them (which I couldn’t do there, because I had no cell reception). This company is owned by a married couple who are big time involved. I found nothing but information linking them to the CoS.

H E L L N O.

I called them and let them know I “took another position” and asked them not to continue with the background check. Then I let my references know not to talk to them at all.

naivety [nye-eev-tee] or naïveté
Noun
the state or quality of being naive.

So let’s recap my day;

1. Way too hot out? Check.
2. My team’s bullpen can eat my poo? Check.
C. I was recruited by a cult? Check.

So then I did what anyone would do; I watched Escape From NY and Escape From LA, back-to-back on UHD.

Selling a piece of my past.

This is the first skateboard deck from the BMX company, Terrible One. I was majorly obssessed with them back in my BMXing days. They were a rad mix of bikes, music and art. And their t-shirts were the bomb. Anyhow, I bought anything and everything they had, because I was single and had too much disposable income.

But honestly, I never liked this design much. The second deck, with Michael Sieben art, was much better. But this one was their first, a gift to team members. They only sold the extras to offset the cost of the gift and because they had to make a minimum order. I know two other guys that still have theirs, but beyond them and the team, I’m not sure any exist.

So with that, I’m hoping some collector on the BMX forums stands up and pays me handsomely for it. I’d love to get a new pair of glasses, with Transitions.

Lakers Celtics, oh my. (Volume II)

Graffiti on our front gate.

Late Thursday Product Endorsement: Where I left my heart…

I know it’s late, but who’s counting anyhow?

This serves both as a continuation of the last entry and my product endorsement for the week. On Sunday, we were scheduled to work at the famous Haight Ashbury Street Fair, in its 31st year. This is the fest that numerous bands played back in the day, and I was pretty excited.

But I wasn’t prepared for how excited I’d really be. I didn’t think I’d care much about being a block away from where the Dead lived in 1967, but I was like a little kid, all giddy and shit, constantly looking up stuff on my phone and talking about buying a tye-dye shirt… I had my hippy days, at the end of high school and beginning of college, when I got into the Dead and Phish and hiking and all that. I wore hemp and Vasque Sundowners and raided my dad’s records, but I never really smoked much pot; so all and all, I sucked at hippying. But I still enjoy the music, so I was a little overwhelmed being there, where a lot of what I listen to started at. Plus, they had the best pizza I’d ever had…

I honestly wasn’t prepared to like San Francisco as much as I did. There’s only a few cities in my love category, and SF joined them like a force. I like a lot of places, and despise a lot of places, but SF was one of those places that I felt at home, just like Milwaukee. It had a vibe, a pulse, a soul. It was relaxed, yet moving. The public transportation was off the hook. It had an old feeling, that squished city upon city feel that I love. The only downside I can really come up with is f those hills right in their bicycle holes how big the hils are. You’ve gotta be tough as hell to ride your bike there. Or know the streets and hills and ways up/around them. You never felt like you just went as far as you did; which is opposite off LA, where everything feels so much further away than it truly is. I couldn’t believe we were there for just barely 36 hours. It felt like we did so much, and were there so long.

So this week’s Product Endorsement goes to San Francisco. Go there now!

Awesome weekend.

Finally, the weekend we’ve been waiting for. Okay, not the weekend (that’s in two weeks), but we’ve been excited about going to San Francisco for the weekend; to celebrate Casey’s birthday, to work lemonade at the Haight Ashbury Street Fair, and just plain hang out for the weekend.

Upon our arrival at the hotel, we were immediately greeted by about 50-100 naked cyclists and rollerbladers heading past… I knew the weekend was going to be interesting.

The hotel was… pretty cool. We couldn’t decide if it was the coolest place, or the shadiest place. We had to wait for the boss man to come from the airport to get into our rooms. The lounge was closed, for what we assumed was ever, only to find later it magically appeared like a Harry Potter night club. Our room had one full bed, one twin. And the window opened completely up! I can’t remember if I’ve EVER seen that. But, it had a giant lion in the lobby, so we knew we were safe.

We gathered everyone up and headed to Chinatown for lunch. The food was excellent, the company top notch and the drinks were flowing. We took in the shops a bit, then grabbed a beer at a killer little bar named Buddha, which had a great jukebox.

We took the trolley down to the wharf, saw Alcatraz and played in an exhibit of old arcade games that Kevin had heard of. We took our pictures in an old-fashioned photobooth. Played baseball, basketball and bowling games. Had our fortunes told by gypsies. Watched creepy marionette shows. And Michele got whooped in arm wrestling.

All that awesomeness, having the best Casey’s birthday ever, made us hungry enough to eat our own arms (if they weren’t made of meat, of course). We headed back on the trolley to find the dinner restaurant, Steps of Rome. It is at this point I have to give mad props to the My Location feature of Google Maps on the iPhone and Blackberry. It proved to be extremely useful for the entire trip. We were meeting back up with those we left at Chinatown, and Casey and his ladyfriend, as he took off the second we landed on dry land, probably to go do it a lot.

For his birthday, Casey wanted what any man wants; good Italian food, good spirits, his best friends and a lap dance from Italian waiters. Okay, so he didn’t get that, not even from the Italian waitress.

From here, the party did what birthday parties do…

To be continued…